WEEK ONE of launching a bakery… Here’s what I didn’t expect

MY FIRST MEMORIES ARE SITTING IN MY LIVING ROOM AS A KID WATCHING RACHEL RAY AND BOBBY FLAY, BEING EXCITED THAT MY MOM OR GRANDMA LET ME HELP THEM BAKE A LEMON CAKE IN THE FANCY BUNDT PAN. IT WAS THOSE MEMORIES THAT MOVED MY TO PICK UP BAKING AS A HOBBY IN MY TEENS AND 10 YEARS LATER, TO FINALLY LAUNCH MY MICRO BAKERY. BUT ALL THAT GLITTERS ISN’T GOLD. IN MY CASE, IT’S WHITE (HA!). I LOVE BAKING BUT THERE WERE DEFINITELY THINGS I LET THE GLOW OF MAKING MY DREAMS COME TRUE HIDE. HERE ARE THREE THINGS I DIDN’T EXPECT WHEN I DECIDED TO PURSUE OPENING MY MICRO BAKERY IN MY FIRST WEEK OF RECIPE TESTING.

1.       FLOUR COSTS. NEVER IN A MILLION YEARS DID I IMAGINE MYSELF GOING, “ HUH, $250 IS JUST IN BUDGET”. FOR A SHOPPING CART FULL OF FLOUR. MY FIRST WEEK ( I WASN’T EVEN SELLING YET, JUST TRYING  TO GET THE WORD OUT ABOUT MY BAKED GOODS AND GET A FEEL FOR WHAT PEOPLE WANTED) I PURCHASED 41 POUNDS OF FLOUR. BY THE MIDDLE OF THE WEEK HALF ALREADY GONE. YOU KNOW YOU’RE GOING TO NEED A LOT OF FLOUR IF YOU HAVE A SOURDOUGH STARTER. BUT THE BREAD YOU MAKE WITH THE STARTER ALSO REQUIRES FLOUR!! HA,  WHO KNEW?! APPARENTLY EVERYONE BUT ME. I MEAN I KNEW BUT, KNOWING IT AND SEEING IT ARE TWO VERY DIFFERENT THINGS.

2.       FORGET DOUBLE OVENS, I NEED A WALK IN FRIDGE IN MY GARAGE. MY POOR FRIDGE IS BURSTING AT THE SEAMS WITH DOUGH IN VARIOUS STAGES OF FERMENTATION AND PROOFING. FRIENDS AN FAMILY THINK I’M FANCY FOR COOKING A NEW MEAL FOR  DINNER EVERY SINGLE DAY BUT THE REALITY IS I DON’T HAVE ENOUGH ROOM FOR ALL THIS STUFF.

3.       WHY DIDN’T ANYONE TELL ME THAT SOURDOUGH STARTER SMELLS LIKE $#!+?! I WANT TO KNOW WHO DECIDED TO WITHHOLD THAT INFORMATION FROM ME. THEY DESCRIBE STARTER SMELL OF YEAST BUT WHAT THEY DON’T TELL YOU IS YEAST ACTUALLY SMELLS GROSS. AND EVEN WORSE IT LINGERS!! A HEAVENS FORBID YOU DON’T FEED IT ON TIME AND NOW IT SMELLS LIKE 80 PROOF. I PROMISE THIS IS ALL IN GOOD FUN. I LOVE MY STARTER AND I AM VERY PROUD OF IT. BUT HAD I KNOW THIS AHEAD OF TIME I MIGHT HAVE JUST BOOKED AN APPOINTMENT WITH MY SHRINK INSTEAD OF LEARNING TO MASTER A NEW BAKING SKILL. BEGINNERS BE WARNED YOU MIGHT WANNA BUY SOME PPE. I’M KIDDING OF COURSE. DON’T WASTE MONEY ON THAT YOU’RE ALMOST OUT OF FLOUR.